• Peter

    This week started off with a few new faces. We had Rohail, who was rejoining the Mastery Program where he left off last time. Then another student came in for the night. Then we had another coach, Rob, who completed the Mastery Program a year ago. After only a year, I could tell from his body language alone that he was very good. It was also beneficial watching him approach/wing a couple sets throughout the infield portion of the night.

    So for the lecture portion, we started off by mock-approaching sets so Chris could see how we’ve progressed and fine-tune us. A few of us would stand gathered in a circle, and one-by-one we’d take turns approaching and opening the sets. Chris recorded me on his phone so that I could see myself approach. It’s very easy to think you are doing it right, but when you see yourself you realize your weak spots. So for me, once again I was monotone. I also was a little stiff. And I would only make eye contact with one or two people. I was consciously thinking about that as I was doing the approach, like who do I look at. So what we’re supposed to do is engage everyone, and constantly shift making eye contact with each person. I guess it’s kind of like giving a speech. Just watching that video of myself made a huge difference.

    Also I realized my opener was ok but I had no solid backstory for it. So Chris had a few of us work on our openers/stories. I came up with a new opener based on a story I had from earlier that day. In the afternoon, before the lecture, I found a free yoga/kayaking group on Meetup. So I attended that event and turned it into an opener. I learned that it’s easier to think of a good solid back story first, and then make an opener based off that. Before, I had been trying to think of a cool opener then developing a story off it. So for my particular story, my opening line was “Hey guys, what do you think about extreme sports.” Throughout the infield portion of the night, based on my interactions, I fine-tuned it and said “outdoor sports/activities” instead of extreme sports since yoga isn’t that extreme lol. I think it’s really good to use a story that relates to something you are passionate about. Like I love outdoor activities such as kayaking and hiking. So it’s good to use a story and opener relating to that, so that the girls that are interested are also ones that have similar interests to a girl I would want. Girls that reject the opener because they don’t like outdoor activities wouldn’t be the girl for me anyway.

    Then we all practiced our openers in pairs, mostly to get us flowing on our stories. I found once I started talking about my backstory I could elaborate and add details. Chris emphasized how we should use a ton of detail when giving our backstory. Like how it was a beautiful sunny day as we laid out in the lush green field doing yoga with the soft breeze whiffing the smell of sweet flowers as we did our breathing exercises. Instead of saying we laid on our yoga mats and did yoga for an hour.

    After that, we did more opening practice, this time with a wing. We learned a lot more tips and details than we did in the free seminar on winging. So one of us would open as usual. Then part of the way into the conversation, the wing would come up and tap the guy on the shoulder and asked if he saw Chris. (Jimmy and I had been doing this last week and several times the second he tapped me, I would naturally turn around and the girls would mirror me and leave. We brought this up to Chris this week, and just as we thought we were breaking rapport. So a little tip is to not tap the guy from behind, just come up alongside of him and kind of lean in.) So after asking for Chris, the main guy would point across the group and the wing would start to leave, but then the main guy will call him back and say “Hey Jimmy I want you to come meet these girls. They seem pretty cool, except this one” (jokingly saying to your target, thereby teasing her and also indicating to your wing who you want so he can choose one of the other girls). Another thing we learned was building up your wing because you are only as cool as your friends. So Jimmy is building a cool mobile app, loves motocross and MMA. So I’d then say “This is Jimmy, he’s building the next big mobile app, really cool guy, really into motocross and MMA.” Ideally you’d know (or remember!) the girls’ names and introduce them all. Otherwise your wing can just introduce himself, and this time you better pay attention to their names! Then you’d each try to isolate a girl. On a side note, I am terrible with remembering names. Like in a set of 3 or more, I’d forget the first girl’s name by the time I was at the 3rd. Also, half the time in the field I would not hear what they said their name was and ask what they said and not hear again so then just nod my head lol.

    Now for the infield! This time we went to Gansevoort on 29th and Park Avenue. We got there a little before 10pm. It started off slow, but eventually it got packed. I started off approaching a 2 set, which quickly became a 4 set, then turned out to be a huge bachelorette party. I congratulated the bachelorette and she started smacking my target’s butt and telling me how sexy and cool she was (I guess building her up lol). So a little later my target wanted to go congratulate her friend, but at the same time I could tell part of her wanted to stay and talk. So I told her to go with her friends and I’d go with mine and I’d catch up to her later. I approached so many other sets I ended up forgetting about that one. As the night went on and as I approached more and more sets I was getting more warmed up and energetic and could feel my sets getting better. Hector also coached me through a few different sets. He had me go to a couple 2 sets that were seated. So I knelt down beside them and proceeded like usual. I felt like I couldn’t body-rock or shift around much with being knelt down though. I should have touched more too. So Hector took me to a quieter spot downstairs and had me practice really rocking back and forth. I felt constrained with it being so crowded and didn’t want to bump into people. Now I realize I wasn’t taking up much space, which alpha guys do. Once he was sure I was going to move more, he put me on more sets. A couple were cold. We went to an outdoor patio and I approached a really hot 3 set. The first 2 girls weren’t into outdoor sports, but my target was so I high-fived her. Then 3 guys walked up along my right and it kinda went silent lol. I introduced myself to one guy but he seemed stoned. So then I was like I’m going to find my friends and left.

    Throughout the night we did several other sets. We also winged each other more tonight, though I did plenty of sets alone as well. A couple times I forgot to build my wing up, then it would seem to go awkward. I found when I built my wing up as I introduced him, the girls would be more enthusiastic with both me and my wing. One 3 set Jimmy opened, but he never indicated which girl he was interested in by teasing her that the others are cool except her so I just went for the one closest to me (after Jimmy and I talked later he said he didn’t really care which girl he wanted but I think maybe I took his target lol). So after I was introduced, I quickly broke off alone with my target but Jimmy was stuck with 2 girls. So then Evan re-winged him! It was pretty funny looking back at it. We probably used the same wing technique both times. I was already isolated but I could see them out of the corner of my eye. I believe Jimmy didn’t indicate which one he was interested in so Evan took that one too lol. But now we each had our own target. I had already been able to step alongside my target with my back to the wall and facing the bar, and tapped her shoulder to ask her a question and got her to naturally shift her back on her friends. All 3 of us continued our individual conversations with each girl. Then I tried moving my girl to the dance room. I grabbed her hand and began moving her but then as I looked back her friends grabbed her hand and were coming along too like a little choo-choo train. So then I looked back and jokingly said wow I didn’t know you needed chaperones. Then I saw Chris and the other guys and told my target and her friends I was just going to hang with them instead, then they actually kept going to the dance room lol. Looking back, Chris told me try moving her just a few feet away at first. I was shooting for a big move. Should have did a little move then build it up.

    Then a 3 set of very hot girls approached a couple of us, they asked if I had a room at the hotel so they could go outside in the VIP pool, so I figured they were gold diggers and played around with them and said wow we just met and you’re already trying to find out where my room is. One girl I was able to briefly isolate and started moving her, but then the friends came so I let them go because I realized it’d just be a waste of time. I think Hector left around this time. Then we moved back to the blue light room. It was pretty packed. I approached a 3 set of hot blondes. I was able to kind of get one facing more toward me, not full isolation. I wanted to move along side her and face a different direction like I’ve been doing to get her to move her back to her friends but it was too crowded and people kept bumping into us. I should have tried moving them to a different room. They left about 5 seconds before Evan was about to wing me. Then Chris left, and Jimmy left shortly after. Evan and I stuck around longer like usual, along with Rohail. We approached a couple more sets.

    Then I went for a 3 set and Rohail was going to wing me. But once I opened it, the other two girls kind of just ditched the one girl with me. So Rohail was left on the sidelines, I believe him and Evan kept going though. So this redhead I was with, her behavior reminded me of the girl I messed up with at the end of week 1. When we shook hands she really wanted to hold it I could just sense, so I held onto her hand longer and she never let go and eventually put her hand on my chest. So we talked a little and I asked if she liked to dance and she said yeah so I grabbed her hand again and said lets go to the dance floor. I was hoping she’d say no because I can’t dance lol. But anyway she came. We got to the end of the hallway right before the dance floor and I just turned her there and started talking to her. I really didn’t want to dance. So then we talked a little and she put her arms on my shoulders and gazed at me so we ended up kissing. Shortly after she stopped and said to me I look like the kind of guy that just wants a one-nighter. So I smirked and said she is so cool she might even get 2 nights. So I’m not sure where she got that opinion or how I was supposed to respond to that. I ended up getting her number but I think she’s going to flake. She said she’s going on a cruise or something for a week and to text her next Saturday, so we’ll see. She said it was her best friend’s boyfriend’s birthday so she wanted to tell her something but she’d be back. I ended up just finding Evan and Ro and telling them about my experience. Then I approached one more set for the night. Another 3 set, they were very energetic, but I was pretty pumped so it went well. I think I screwed that one up by jumping straight for my target too overeagerly, like directing the conversation only to her and ignoring the other two. It was in a tricky area and my target was in the middle against a wall where I couldn’t really pivot my body and get her to shift her back to her friends.

    Overall an amazing night, and next weekend will be even better!


    Reading through this and I really like how you kept engaging set after set Pete. You didn’t care too much about one specific set and just went onto the next one, even saying “I’ll find you guys later.” Sometimes that can be good and sometimes bad – if physical escalation is the issue then that can be a cop out, but I don’t think it was in your case because you did get physical with the girl in red until she had to go. I like the abundant mindset you had. Great job man, keep it up.

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