Five tips to prevent burnout article by Craft of Charisma

Five Tips to Prevent Social Burnout

Have you ever gone out so much that you got burned out or sick? It’s happened to me a few times, including as recently as August. I hadn’t been going out that consistently during the summer, so I decided to go hard, and went out six out of the next 10 days. Right after that stretch, I caught a cold, had to stay in for a week to recover, and then lost the habit of going out to work on my social skills and meet women. Fail.

If you’re not used to being in social environments, going out consistently in the nightlife scene can be exhausting. Improperly managing your health, energy, and emotions can make things even worse, and ultimately lead to burnout.

Here are five strategies I’ve developed for preventing burnout when going out consistently.

1. Don’t drink alcohol!

From what I’ve observed, most people in the nightlife scene drink. Before I knew about self-improvement, I was one of those people. I would often go out with my friends to the bar and get wasted, because I had nothing better to do with my life. I was miserable, so getting drunk was an easy way to escape from reality.

When I first started going out specifically to socialize and meet women, I really cut back on my alcohol consumption. Typically, I would only have one or two drinks, enough to fit in with the crowd, but not enough to have an effect on my mental state. Now, I rarely even have one drink, and usually just stick to water.

The main problem I have with alcohol is that people (including my former self) use it as a crutch to get social. If you rely on getting buzzed to start talking to girls, then what are you going to do if you see a cute girl during the day? If you need some ideas on how to get loose without alcohol, check out my article on the Five Principles to Internalize Before Going Out.

Beyond this, from a health perspective, alcohol is a depressant and a diuretic, so it lowers your mood and has a tendency to cause dehydration. These symptoms will sap your energy and motivation, which are both vital to staying on the journey of improving your social and dating life.

2. Stay hydrated and well-nourished

When you’re out at the club dancing and talking for hours, your calories are burning away. Nervous energy only accelerates this process. It’s important to stay hydrated and well-nourished to avoid suffering from bad breath, low energy, and other unpleasant symptoms.

If you get hungry, grab a bite to eat somewhere, because this is fuel that your brain needs in order to function at its best and be able to have a great conversation with that cute girl! But it also depends on the quality of the food you eat. In general, you want to stick to fresh, healthy food and cut out products with a lot of grease, added sugar, preservatives, caffeine, etc.

3. Set a curfew

Staying out too late will screw up your sleep schedule and leave you feeling tired and lethargic. Then it becomes easier to start making excuses to avoid going out. If it’s Thursday or Friday and you want to go out the next night or two, staying up too late can add up and lead to burnout.

Before you go out, set a time that you’ll leave the venue by. I usually set my curfew around 1:30 or 2:00 AM, depending on how I’m feeling. If it’s a Saturday night, then it’s okay to stay out later, since you can just sleep in on Sunday and not have to worry about going out late again that night.

The one thing that setting a curfew may hinder is the possibility of meeting a girl later in the night. One time, I was out having an awful night, and then right before the bar closed, I met a cute girl and had a nice interaction with her. It didn’t go anywhere, but that one positive experience let me leave that night with a good feeling.

However, if you are connecting well with a girl, don’t be silly and leave just because you gave yourself a curfew. The main goal of going out is meeting women and improving your social skills, so if an opportunity presents itself, take advantage of it and get that reference experience.

4. Gradually build up your activity

As I mentioned in the introduction, I got sick in August after going out six of 10 nights. Before that intense period of socializing, I hadn’t gone out in a couple of weeks, so I felt rusty and nervous when I got back out there.

Starting to go out again was a struggle because I had gotten used to being anti-social. The nightlife environment brought out a lot of negative energy and emotions, due to lack of acclamation, approach anxiety, and a flurry of other fears and insecurities. All the hours of stress and negativity added up, weakened my immune system, and because I wasn’t properly nourishing and hydrating myself when I was out, it left me vulnerable to getting sick.

If you haven’t been out in a while, gradually build up your activity week by week so that you don’t overload yourself. This allows you to ease back into it and get used to being in social environments again. Try one night the first week, then build up to two nights, and then three nights, while also increasing your daytime social activities.

Personal preference will determine how much you want to go out. Push yourself past your limits, but also don’t go so far that you start neglecting other important areas of your life. No matter how much you go out, I suggest having at least one “off day” a week, so that you can relax and recharge. This also gives you time to analyze your progress and determine what you’re doing well and what you need to do differently.

5. Be socially active during the day

Make sure that you’re also engaging in social activities during the day. I’ve always found that going out to meet women in the nightlife scene is more difficult during periods when I’m being less social in other aspects of my life. For example, if I’ve been spending all day working alone on the computer, then going into highly stimulating and social environments like bars and clubs feels overwhelming and causes extra stress, which then ruins my interactions.

To keep from falling into this trap, set aside time to go to interest groups, Meetups, etc., and talk to people. Getting social, especially in the hours leading up to going out to the club, builds social momentum and will help you feel more relaxed and talkative. As I discuss in greater detail in The Importance of Trying New Activities, doing more things and having more experiences will also add richness to your conversations and give you more to talk about.

Following these five tips has helped me immensely in maintaining energy and motivation, and staying consistent with going out and socializing. Consistency is one of the most important keys to success, and by staying consistent, you are moving closer and closer to meeting the girl of your dreams!


Mike is the Producer for the Craft of Charisma Podcast.


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